But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
1 Corinthians 11:3
It is important that we model the headship order for our children. Our family relationship should be an image of the relationship between Jesus and His Church. Having the correct order of authority established is the starting point for any family discipline.
Any soldier will tell you, you lead from the front. The parents example in all spiritual things is what will have the greatest effect on the children. Parents must lead. If we do not lead by both rule and example the world will.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
Ephesians 6:1-3
Parents have different personalities and parenting styles – there is no one right “style” for raising children, but your children must always know that everything you do for them is out of love and for their good.
And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:4
The goal is to have a relationship of respect and understanding where you can communicate your love and also the fact that restriction of online use is for our good.
If you were to watch a video or read a forum about how to set up Qustodio (for example), you will find the comment section filled with angry posts from young teens about how terrible the software is, and how cruel their parents are for putting it on their systems. It was unfair, they had no right to do that, it has ruined their lives, and so on. The amount of rebellion and entitlement on display is saddening.
We expect to have better relationships with our children, but we also realize that requires work on our part. What was missing for those teens? Basic understanding of their parents authority over them, and its source. That led to pride and rebellion.
We avoid that by clearly communicating that we as parents are in charge of the children’s use of electronics – just as parents are in charge of everything else in their lives. You control what they can use, what they use it for, and when they can use it, because God has placed them are under your headship.
If the headship order is practiced and clear in our homes, our children will recognize our authority to regulate their technology use – and explanation and understanding proceeds from that.